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And you know what? I was dangerously horny too. First true Valentines Day I spent alone in a long long time. I signed up for a premium Pornhub account (It was free.). I’m willing to give them the benefit of the doubt, thats all I’m saying. I dunno, maybe he was scratching tally marks on the wall every time he nutted or something like that. I dunno how they counted the other 59 sessions but thats why they are South African police investigating masturbation death and I’m just a lowly blogger. By that point you’re tapping into the reserve tanks, emptying some cum from deep in your toes. I mean if I reach 3 I feel like I’m shooting blanks. I’d have to imagine by like your 20th go-round your body is just completely dehydrated.
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Calculating cubic volume of semen and estimating the average amount per nut. How many golf balls can fit in a 747? How many pennies to reach the top of the Empire State Building? These cops show up and start guesstimating how many loads in order to confirm the cause of death. Almost like those questions you get asked on a job interview. So much cum everywhere they did the math and surmised this must be upwards of 62 sessions. I want to believe that African police showed up and the room looked like Randy Marsh in front of his PC. I want to live in a world where an African dude was so sad he ripped his cock right off his body and they found his dead corpse with his severed dick in his hand. You’re probably wondering “how did they know it was 62 times?” You’re probably thinking “there’s no way you could jerk your dick clean off of your body.” And I suppose these are all valid questions. You’re probably saying this sounds like your typical fake news viral story out of Africa or Asia. Now I know the skeptics out there aren’t going to believe this. Investigators are still investigating the case for more information, Mabuza’s funeral will take place sometime next week. “The young man was on his bed… his pen*s was detached from his body, it must have been so intense it just came off his body, we found his pen*s gripped in his left hand so tightly we couldn’t get it out, it was tragic”. Officer Ronny Mkhize told Nusa reporters what they saw when they opened David’s bedroom door. Police arrived at the home about an hour after Ms. David was the kind of boy to steal food off your plate when you were not looking, i knew something was wrong when he didn’t come out to eat, he was a great kid” she said as she began to cry. David’s mother told Nusa reporters “1 hour passed since I had called him out for lunch. David’s Mother called the SAPS after discovering his corpse in his room. It is speculated that he was suffering from depression due to being “extremely lonely” on Valentines Day. Mabuza, who lived with his parents, was found dead in his bedroom after apparently masturbating too much. Valentines Day ended in tragedy for David Mabuza after he apparently masturbated a world record, jaw-dropping 62 times non-stop before dying of a heart attack. Daily Pakistan – A 33-year-old single man from Bloemfontein in South Africa died on Wednesday afternoon after he masturbated 62 times in a row.